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Having a D&C (Journal)

I was praying for a go signal from God if I should go through the procedure or still wait for a natural miscarriage.

It was confirmed that I had a failed pregnancy - a blighted ovum.

I know we've already discussed. Hubby and I have agreed but I still have doubts. Until the last minute at home, I was still contemplating.

I DO NOT, IN ANY WAY, PROMOTE ABORTION THROUGH D&C!
This journal might be of help to those who are diagnosed with blighted ovum and a failed pregnancy. Remember. You are not alone. I hope this post will help give you an idea and help prepare you if you ever decide to have a D&C.

view from the bed, inside the ob-gyne clinic

Sorry for the TMI (Too Much Information)
This post is not necessarily gory but it has details that may be uncomfortable for people to read. If you're that kind of people, STOP RIGHT HERE. Also, this post is really long.

July 9, 2016 - Saturday

0400H
Medicated with primrose oil capsule used as a vaginal suppository to soften the cervix. Yes. I had to insert the capsule 'down there' as deep as I can. Not a very pleasant way to medicate but necessary. I started the medication around Thursday night, repeated every 6 hours. After medicating, I had to wait for the capsule's casing to melt and let the oil reach the cervix. Medyo mahapdi minsan. (Sometimes, it stings.) I had to stay in bed laying on my back. If I stand the oil will just leak out and it will only be wasted.

0930H
I packed a bag just in case the doctor says my cervix has opened and I can have a d&c on the day. I packed some clothes,  toiletries, a sketchpad (my most important anti-boredom device) and some electronics.

1000H
Our appointment with the doctor. I had a pelvic exam while hubby plays Clash Royale.


During a pelvic exam, you will be asked to lie on your back, put your leg on stirrups. The doctor will examine your lady parts for infection or in my case, check if the cervix has softened.
She confirmed that my cervix has indeed softened and I'm ready for the d&c procedure.

It's a surgical procedure to remove the contents of the uterus. In my case, the rest of the gestational sac had to be removed since I have been spotting/bleeding for more than a week.

We agreed to do the D&C as soon as possible. No more eating or drinking beyond this point. The doctor inserted another suppository to further soften the cervix. She instructed me to stay lied down while waiting for the medicine to melt. I barely felt it when it melted. I tried amusing myself by taking photos of the ceiling and the wall to forget my anxiety.


1115H
We were sent to the ER so I can be set up with IV. The nurse wanted to take my right hand. I offered my left instead because I wanted to sketch while recovering. She found a vein but the vein REJECTED the needle. Rejection hurts kasi pumutok yung ugat. (The vein popped.) huhuhuhu... *sobs* I gave up and let her put the IV on my right hand. Bummer! No sketching for the rest of the hospital stay.



Sketching is not gonna happen. It's a good thing I had free facebook connection. I was able to respond to messages and well wishes. I was extra clumsy in typing, but I thought, this is definitely better than crying or overthinking the surgical procedure.

I was supposed to attend a very important event but I couldn't. I forgot to inform them I was already in the hospital. They thought I was still home.

Our pastor called just to check on us. It was a rather brief call. He just wanted to pray for us and make sure we're doing okay.


1200H
Finally settled in a hospital bed but still in the ER. There was no available room yet. The nurse closed the curtain to give us privacy. Of course we could still hear what's going on outside.

It's lunch time and I'm so hungry. Hubby kept telling me he'll eat at Jollibee while I'm only allowed to swallow my own drool.... huhuhu *dying inside*

At least I had the IV... What's in the IV is food that's sent directly through the veins...

I say, "Nothing beats real food, food that goes through the mouth."

I told him to go eat lunch but he wouldn't. I even offered crackers but he didn't want to eat.

Much nosebleed when a foreigner came in to have his skin checked out. It seems he couldn't handle heat in Manila. The nurses nervously accommodated him. Some wrong pronunciation and grammar heard - I couldn't help but correct them in my mind. Hehehehe.


1300H
A little boy came to the ER with his mom. The nurses had a hard time setting him up with the IV. He was hysterical! He must have been so scared of the needle. (I am scared of needles too. I didn't even look when the nurse set my IV.)

Whenever he says "Mommy" hubby and I would sing a line or two of "Bohemian Rhapsody". Ang kulit namin! I wonder if my IV has some crazy drugs in it. Fine by me.
Oxytocin is a happy drug because it makes my uterus contract?!?!


1500H


My poor husband, tired, hungry and taking advantage of all the time he can snooze off while we wait.

I should already be in the operating room by now, but the room wasn't prepared yet. Hubby still hasn't eaten lunch. I feel bad for him. The doctor visited us and assured us that the room is being cleaned and prepared.








1530H
I'm going to be transferred!!! I got on a wheelchair. I can still walk but I'd rather not because of the bleeding and the contractions.


"Alipin! Bitbitin ang mga gamit!" (Bring my stuff, servant!)
My husband knows I'm just joking.

So I thought we were going to the room, but the nurse said I had to go directly to the operating room. I did not object, but I admit I wanted to go to the room and get settled in first...

So the nurse took me to the corridor just outside the operating room. My husband had to wait in the hallway. I had a shower cap on. By that time it was too late to cancel. I'm having the d&c for sure.


1400H
We went to the operating room.

I was so scared. I started thinking "Ilan na kaya namatay dito?" (How many have died in this room?) You know, morbid thoughts. What if the anesthesia doesn't work? What if something goes wrong? I couldn't help but be scared. I've never been conscious in an operating room before! It doesn't help that the two nurses are of the serious type. Creepy vibe...

My last operation in 2003, they administered the anesthesia while I was still in the ward. I had no memory of the operation itself or how the operating room even looks like.

I started distracting myself by making an ocular inspection of the operating room. The ceiling have some cracks. One part of the wall had chipped paint. The lights look a little dated...

The nurse helped me take off my clothes while the other nurse assembled the stirrups. The stirrups were so far apart! I thought, "My legs aren't long and they can't possibly open THAT wide. I don't know how that setup can work." I'm sure they had it adjusted during the operation.

I felt a little relief when my doctor came in. She's cheerful as always. Her presence somehow lessened my fear.

As they prepared the drugs and the tools, I looked to God in prayer. I just have to trust Him because there's nothing else I can do. I hoped that I can just sleep through it and not feel anything. I thanked Him one more time for the abundance of His grace. I know that He'll be with me all throughout the operation.

I signed the waiver. The nurse administered the drugs: one through my left arm and one through the IV. The first drug just feels heavy on the arm. The one through the IV felt cold at first, followed by a painful stinging sensation. I felt it reach my throat and I had trouble breathing. I started coughing. They hooked me up on oxygen. I immediately felt drowsy but still conscious.

I could still hear the doctor calling out to me, "Inaantok ka na ba?" (Are you sleepy yet?)
I remember answering her as I was still conscious, "Hindi pa po." (Not yet.)

She repeated the question and I answered her again because I was still awake. That's the last thing I remember.


2100H


I woke up to a dimly lit room with a familiar shadow cast over me. It was Hubby! Good. I wasn't abducted by organ harvesters or aliens. So I guess the operation was a success!

I thanked God one more time for being with me through the operation and for letting me see my husband again. *sappy tears*

Then I started to bleed... I got nothing on but the hospital gown!!! There's so much blood! I'm lying on the pool of my own blood! Gore fest!

So he called a nurse to help move me and replace the bedding. Hubby tried to nudge me to the side but my hips hurt really badly. The nurse took another piece of linen to absorb the blood as I still can't move.

I asked my husband to help me get dressed or put on underwear at least. Only then did my husband realize what the sanitary pad and the underwear is for! I can move a little (and I'm not butt-naked anymore) so they finally changed the bed sheet!

Another nurse went in and removed the IV.

I went back to recharge mode.



July 10, 2016 - Sunday

0100H

Goodbye hospital gown! Hello normal clothes!

Can I eat now?

My last meal was 7:00 AM yesterday at home. I was so hungry. Roy asked the nurses if I can eat. I had to convince him that nausea has faded away. There's no way I'll vomit the food. I'm REALLY HUNGRY.

I had a very satisfying cheeseburger and fries with hot chocolate midnight snack, but I felt bad for my very exhausted husband.

He told me that my parents, our pastor and his wife, my good friend and maid-of-honor all came to visit. I was still unconscious and SNORING at the time. I didn't want to believe him when he said I snored. I do not snore. I'm in total denial.


0600H
Hospital breakfast isn't too bad. I had arroz caldo, coffee and a banana.
Roy decided to go home to feed our furbaby, Xena, and get some other stuff.

0800H
I can walk now! Yay!
It's good to know I'm bleeding less now and it's not painful at all.

0830H
Roy came back with pancakes. He ate all of them because I was still full.

0900H
First round of oral meds

Cefuroxime smells and 'tastes' like glue.
Celecoxib is a really small capsule.
Roy went to the Baptist church nearby to attend the service. I wish I could go. He said he'll sneak me out of the hospital so I can attend too but I declined the offer. I decided to stay and be a good patient.


0930H
The nurse informed me that I will be released within the day. We'll just have to wait a bit longer because a lot of other patients are processed to be released too.

She gave me a comment form to answer. Their service is good but some of the facilities need fixing. Overall, I'm satisfied with my care.

Roy came back to check on me. I told him I can manage so he went back to church and attended the service. I'm not mad that he left me alone because I know that going to church is very important to him. I'm actually happy that he chose to glorify God in His day.


1020H
I felt really bored and sleepy, especially now that I'm alone.
I felt a bit sad too because my uterus has drained out and that there's no baby to bury, just lumps of blood.

A photo posted by Kye Felix-Pajela (@sleepwalkingscarlet) on


I'm not 100% sad, just whenever I remember that I lost someone dear to me.


1100H
I'm finally falling asleep when the other patients in the ward decided to do a mashup of nursery rhymes and senti songs. I just laughed and sang along instead of complaining.


1145H
Lunch has arrived!
It's more appetizing than it looks. I had nilagang baka (Filipino beef stew with clear broth), a cup of rice and an apple. Roy bought two piece fried chicken. I took some of the chicken skin! Yum!


1235H
Hubby tucked me in and sang "Soft Kitty."

This song.

He didn't finish the song because I started laughing as soon as he started singing.


1500H
My parents came to visit! They brought food! I looked for my brothers but they weren't available at the time.
The pastor of the nearby church and his daughter came too and he prayed for us.


1530H
Hubby settled the bill. We packed up and as soon as we're ready, I rode the wheelchair on my way out. I felt a sense of relief. I'd rather recover at home where there's stuff to do and of course, wifi... Kidding aside, I just want to go home. I'm worried about how Xena is doing.


1600H
Home sweet home!
It's nice to be welcomed by furbaby tailwagging and puppy drool kisses. Xena will be our one and only baby until we're ready to give her a playmate.


Feel free to read Katie's story as well. I got the journal's idea from her.
Blighted Ovum: Surgically Removed - The Red Kitchen (READ HERE)
Blighted Ovum: How I'm Feeling The Morning After Surgery - The Red Kitchen (READ HERE)

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