The Search

The venue is the first and foremost thing to be considered in planning a wedding; given that you and your hubby are 100% sure to commit to one another for the rest of your lives. When you already have the date of the event, reserve a venue right away.

credits: Pixabay

Why is it so important to decide upon the location asap?

The place dictates most, if not all other aspects of the event.

• How many guests can fit?
• What will they wear?
• What theme and motif suits the area?
• Do you need an additional sound system?
• How about additional lighting?
• How will the place be decorated?

Our search began.

Roy and I have been to several locations sampling dishes and inspecting venues for the big day. We went to one meeting out of town. That meeting was meant for business. The minute we stepped in the facility where he's supposed to present their company's products, I immediately thought, "This is where we are getting married." I looked at him and I could tell he was thinking the same thing. "Pag-usapan natin mamaya." ["Let's talk about it later." he said.]

We found it!

Love at first sight. It was a dreamy location away from the city. There's a lot of grass. We sampled a really good sandwich and near-perfect brownies that afternoon. There's a pool somewhere. White buildings on rolling terrain. A lot of trees. Scented candles. Hot jasmine tea. Perfect.

Everything was perfect until we saw the price.

Can we afford it? Maybe. If we aim high enough, finish all our projects in time, maybe we can get paid in time. Maybe my projects can sustain part of the cost. Maybe he'll sell more products.  Maybe he'll have a huge commission before this year ends. Maybe we'll still have money for clothes. Maybe other people can help us with this financial burden.

We decided to replace all the maybe's with "We can do this!"

Knowing that we picked a weekday for our wedding date, we were confident that no one else will. Without formally reserving the date, we continued planning. Everything was set from the theme to the colors, choice of food... We still haven't reserved, and all of the thinking and planning for months will never be final until we did.

November came and I started feeling the pressure. We still haven't reserved it. We haven't gone back to the place. We recently got an updated (updated - meaning increased) quotation through email and one phone conversation with their coordinator. Even after chanting "We can do this" for several months, the question remained. Can we afford it? The answer was a clear "No."

That was the only place I wanted to get married in and I was determined to bend all the other things to be there. I was willing to wear a basic white dress, invite less than fifty people, DIY all the souvenirs, all for my dream to be possible. But even if we did all that, the overall cost was still too high for both of us. In the end, we decided to give up our first venue choice.

I spent a whole night crying, being close-minded to other venue options, and even doubting whether we should go on with the date or postpone because of our financial situation. The next day was just as depressing. Drama lang habang naglalaba, habang nagsasaing, habang nagwawalis. [I continued being a drama queen while doing laundry and various household chores.]

Starting a new search.

That night, we met to discuss venue options. Blaming ourselves for not being financially equipped will not grant us that surreal and expensive place. "Scratch it off the list. We're looking for another one." We felt like going back to step one. Everything regarding the wedding will adjust to the new venue. I saw an instant sense of relief in my fiance's face when I said I give up on option 1.

It's not worth straining the relationship to get things going the way you want them to go. It's not worth hurting the person you love to chase your dream (...In my case, dream wedding.)