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Who Are You, Really?

I liked being her friend.

I never saw her frown.
She always smiles at me.
She always says the nicest things.
She is such an encouragement.
Her laugh is contagious.
She is industrious and dedicated.
She is deeply concerned with my welfare.


I admired a man who was almost always cheerful, bright and positive.

He always has that glow in his face that seems to be coming from the inside.
He walks like he has springs on his feet.
He sings most enthusiastically.
He speaks loud and proud.
He is a motivator.
He is fun to be with.
He could do no wrong to anyone.

I used to dream of becoming like her.

She is smart and feisty.
She is never afraid to speak her mind.
She is honest to the point of being vulnerable.
She is not a stereotype.

I respected and followed a man who was the perfect leader.

He is proud when he needs to be.
He is a principled man.
He sacrifices for the cause he believes in.
He is charismatic.
He is witty and funny and honest.
He can be moody and intense, but that's only because he is human.
He is not afraid to show his emotions.
He remains strong for the people who follow him.



How I wish my thoughts of them were right. 


I don't expect my role models to be perfect. My standards are not sky high. I do not intend to copy a person in his entirety. I only choose the qualities worth emulating and apply them in the way I live. If a role model falls, I expect him to learn from the fall and come back a better person. He would be an even greater encouragement, wouldn't he?



But what if his admirable self is only a mask? A cover-up? A lie?


That woman who was friendly is actually a person who is only capable of being nice to get what she wants. She is a serial user. She will use you and abuse you to reach her ambition. She will forget you as soon as you are no longer useful to her goals. That's who she truly is.

That man who was bright and cheerful and could not do any wrong to any person, is actually a liar and a schemer. When he chooses to be with you, it's because you can offer him money or favors. That's what he really wants from you.

That woman who was smart and honest and admirable turned out to be the most gullible person I ever knew. She is blind to the truth and settled in being blind.

That "perfect" leader I respected and followed was not honest. He was not even funny. He was a manipulating, menacing, greedy pathetic excuse for a man. If you dig deeper into who he really is and all the things he has done, you might think that he's the devil's right-hand man.


Sometimes the deception hurts too much I choose to "unfriend" the people I used to admire. 


Sometimes, when cracks appear in a person's mask of admirable traits, I assume that they are only small flaws. I never suspect underlying causes to the cracks. I dismiss them as plain imperfection. I ignore. I disregard... Soon enough the mask falls off and the true person is revealed.

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